I started thinking about change today. About the changes we go through in our lives and the changes we see in others lives. Life is constantly changing. When we look back though we see the big picture. The little changes culminate into a certain times or phases in our lives.
There is continuity there that we can only see through hindsight. As the title of this blog suggests change is inevitable. Some changes are self directed like healthy eating habits. Some are just part of life like seniors heading to college and parents aging. Some we control and some are beyond our control.
I used to like change. I considered myself a reed in the wind able t
o adapt to almost any situation. To me change was always a good thing. But somewhere along the way, as I began to understand my lack of control, I stopped liking change. There is comfort in having the same address for over three years and knowing your dentist by his first name. Familiarity does breed a contentment of sorts.
These two topics are joined, change and control. I guess a big part of accepting change is letting go of what you think you control. Kit and I do this “thing” (others would call it a coping tool) to help us keep a healthy perspective on change. We make a list of all the things we can control right now. Let’s call that one the short list. We also list all the things we have no control over and need to give over to God. This list contains all the things we worry over. Today I was worrying about change. Rationally I know it does no good but I replay scenarios in my head. It’s counter productive but I’m human. While processing I needed to understand the difference between the things I can control and those I cannot. I thought of the Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
I also spoke with Kit about all of this and as she so often does she hit the nail on the head. It comes down to faith. Faith and acceptance of what may lie ahead. There is no need to worry and fuss over the uncontrollable change in life. Just focus on the short list. That’s all we can really do and I’m glad I have the short list.